Not bad.....

....for 44!!!
Elle has ALWAYS been a favourite of mine. Absolute stunner.
And to think she's had a few kids!

Click on photos to enlarge.

Missy

I saw Missy Higgins in concert last Thursday night and she was very very good!

Awesome voice and amazingly good on the piano and the guitar.

Support act was Tim Rogers (lead singing of You Am I) and he was good too, but he is better upfront of You Am I.

When you see someone with the singing and musical talents of someone like Missy Higgins, those idiots who run Australian Idol, and the contestants, should be ashamed of themselves. Anyone can sing karaoke.

Well worth going and seeing her.

Plus, the crowd was about 80% females! (Although a majority of the females were lesbians and not even slightly interested in me… oh well…)

Go Missy!

Time for Change

The Labor Party today announced it is going to change the Australian Coat of Arms from a Kangaroo and Emu, to a condom.

This is because it better reflects the Labor Party’s political stance more accurately.

A condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks and give you a sense of security while you’re actually being fucked!

I can’t wait for Sunday!

Why?

Because by Sunday, the FUCKING ELECTION WILL BE OVER!!!!

For those living outside this great country, we are having a national election.

And for the past few months (seems like years!) every time you turn on the TV, Radio or open a newspaper or magazine, there are the politicians crapping on about how good they are and how shit everyone else is.

I AM SO FUCKING OVER IT!!!!!!!!!!!

And I’m not sure what some of my fellow Aussie bloggers will be able to blog about next week once the election is over, because that’s about all they’ve been blogging about for the past year or so.

I guess they’ll be wanting to give Kevin Rudd a blowjob or keep on abusing John Howard.

Why change for the sake of change?

Why change a winning team?

You don’t sack the coach at the end of a record winning season do you????

- Booming economy

- Record Aussie Dollar

- Extremely Low Unemployment

- Low inflation

- Low Interest Rates

To quote Chuck Berry :

“Go go
Go Johnny go
Go
Go Johnny go
Go
Go Johnny go
Go
Go Johnny go”

Four great words :

“Nine axes McLeod’s Daughters”
(For all my overseas readers, it was a crap show about a ranch with unbelievable story lines)

Other great news headings I’d love to see :

“Ten axes Australian Idol”

“Seven axes Home & Away”

“Ten axes Law & Order (All versions)”

“Nine axes CSI (All versions)”

“Seven axes All Saints” (I think this might have happened)

“Ten turns Big Brother into XXX-Rated Big Brother”

“All TV stations refuse to show any more Reality TV Shows”

Any other suggestions?

SurferCam Blog Summary

Type of Posts versus Average Number of Comments

Sort of Political posts = 5 Comments

Jokes = 5 Comments

Kiwi Bashing = 6 Comments

Travel = 7 Comments

SurferCam’s drunken antics = 8 Comments

SurferCam bitching about something = 8 Comments

Funny observations = 9 Comments

Good Looking Women = 10 Comments

Boobs = 13+ Comments

Summary – you’re all a bunch of dirty perves…. and that’s why I love you.

Carry on.

I’m off to Church.

Mexican Goddess, and SurferCam fave, Salma Hayek said recently, "My mom and I stopped at a church during a road trip we were making from our home in Mexico. When we went inside, I prayed for the miracle I wanted to happen. I put my hands in holy water and said: 'Please God, give me some breasts'. And he gave me them!"

No shit!

Praise the Lord!

Political Post.... No, not really

Behind the scenes of the election when in New York, Kevin Rudd would always visit his
favourite strip joint.

(He said it helped him forget things.)

But every time he walked in, one of the girls would call out,
"Two hundred bucks, and I'm yours!" 

"Five bucks!"  Rudd would fire back with characteristic wit, just to shut her up.

Over the years this exchange between him and the same girl became a bit of a ritual.  
She'd yell, "Two hundred bucks!" and he'd respond, "Five bucks!" 

Then, on one recent visit to New York, Julia Gillard accompanied Rudd to his favourite strip joint.

As they approached the place, Rudd braced himself for "the usual offer" --
Julia would obviously wonder what it was all about.

He figured he'd better have a darn good explanation for her. 

As he and Julia walked in, Rudd tried very hard to avoid the dancer's eyes.

But sure enough, she spotted him. And she yelled out:

"See! That's what you get for five bucks!" 

4 Year Olds are Funny

Monkey : Daddy, knock knock.
SurferCam : Who's there?
M : Boo.
SC : Boo who?
M : Don't cry Daddy, it's just a joke.

The Only Way To Fly

Forget Qantas.
Forget Emirates.
Forget Virgin.
Forget Singapore Airlines.
Forget Thai Airways.
Forget British Airways.

From now on, I'm flying with these gals !

[ click image above to enlarge ]

Sydney – Random Stuff

What I had forgotten about Sydney:

What a nightmare parking is.

What a nightmare driving around is.

How noisy it is.

How many homeless people there are.

Just how good the view is of the city / bridge / Opera House at night.

How friendly most people are.

What I hadn’t forgotten about Sydney:

How good the service is in restaurants / cafes.

How great the food is.

How great the pubs are.

Best part of the Weekend :

At the wedding I attended, the view back to the city, bridge and Opera House in the afternoon, then as the sun set, then at night. Truly amazing!

Worst part of the Weekend :

Not being able to get the rent-a-car out of the stupid car park for over an hour, with no help from the hotel staff or the car park staff.

Eventually I got agro enough and lifted the boom gate up physically and then drove out. I hope the gate is now broken. I am also expecting some sort of a fine to arrive in the mail….. I'll be telling them politely that they can go fuck themselves!

Lock ‘em up!

Lock up your wives, girlfriends, aunties and daughters – SurferCam is coming to Sydney!

I will be coming down tonight and catching up with some fabulous people, drinking myself silly in many many fine establishments (and some not so fine), gorging myself on great food, restocking my wardrobe that has become a bit daggy since I left Sydney 4 years ago, and getting absolutely trolleyed at a wedding on Saturday.

Can’t wait!

Congrats!

2007 Surfing World Champion

Mick Eugene Fanning

National Convenience Store Clerk Day

Today is the National Convenience Store Clerk Day.

7 - 11 - 2007

I don't want to go to Iraq

A Soldier ran up to a nun. Out of Breath he asked, "Please, may I hide
under your skirt. I'll explain later..

The nun agreed.

A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, "Sister, have you
seen a soldier?" The nun replied, "He went that way."

After the MP's ran off, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt
and said, "I can't thank you enough Sister. You see, I don't want to go to
Iraq."

The nun said, "I understand completely."

The soldier added, "I hope I'm not rude, but you have a great pair of
legs!"

The nun replied, "If you had looked a little higher, you would have
seen a great pair of balls....I don't want to go to Iraq either."